Bad Week For

[noreply66]

Having a dream,after Bill Clinton fell asleep on stage at a Harlem church while listening to a tribune to Martin Luther King Jr.

[noreply66]

MSNBC ,after the cable network flashed a picture of Osama bin Laden instead of Barrack Obama. Reporter David Shuster of the same network was recently suspended after saying that Hillary Clinton's campaign had "pimped out" her daughter, Chelsea.

[mustang_lvr]

Bluejays

[noreply66]

American ingenuity, after a Wisconsin man used a torch to clear the snow from his driveway, setting fire to a garage. Police estimated damage to the garage and two vehicles inside at $20,000.

[noreply66]

The Shark Shield, a device designed to keep sharks away from surfboards by emitting electronic waves, after it was reported in a pre-sales test, one of the devices was eaten by a shark.

[noreply66]

[b]Civil discourse, [/b]after a North Carolina man was arrested for hitting a friend in the head with a baseball bat during an argument over the relative merits of Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama.

[noreply66]

Birdies, after pro golfer Tripp Isenhour was charged with animal cruelty after he killed a squaking hawk by driving a golf ball at it. Isenhour said he was trying to scare the bird away, but struck it squarely on his tenth drive.

[noreply66]

The Grim Reaper, after the village of Sarpourenx, France, outlawed dying. The ordiance was a protest against a court ruling forbidding the town from expanding its cemetery. "Offenders will be severly punished," it decreed.

[noreply66]

Joy Douglas of Boulder, Colorado, who was fined $1,000 for dyeing her miniature poodle pink. Douglas said she stained her dog with natural beet juice to raise awareness of breast cancer, and vowed to fight the case in court.

[noreply66]

Absolution, after an Italian convict who was granted a papal audience for being a " model prisoner" escaped en route to the Vatican. Authorities said inmate Angelo Di Gerraro remained at large, but was not considered dangerous only nervy.

[noreply66]

The passengers of Flight 1536, after a U.S. Airways pilot who was landing a plane in Charlotte, N. C., accidentally fired a gun in the cockpit. The pilot was part of a program begun after 9/11 to allow pilots to be armed. "This has never happened before," said a spokesperson for the Transportation Safety Administration.

[noreply66]

The Vice Squad, after Wisconsin police raided a high school "kegger" only to discover that the kegs were filled with rootbeer. Ninety breat test all turned up negative.

[noreply66]

The honeymoon, after a California wedding reception got a little out of hand, and the police had to subdue both the bride and groom with a Taser. The newlyweds were arrested and spent their first night as husband and wife in jail.

[BubbleGumTiger]

ttt

[noreply66]

Travel guides, after an author who wrote 12 guidebooks for the Lonely Planet series admitted that he often cut corners. They didn't pay me enough to go to Columbia," said Thomas Kohnstamm. "I wrote the book in San Francisco. I got the information from a chick I was dating.

[noreply66]

Cheap suds, after a new Zealand climatologist warned that global warming threatens worldwide barley crops--and beer production.

[noreply66]

Cheap V1@gr@, after a Colorado man was sentenced to 21 months in prison for sending hundreds of thousands of spam e-mails.

[noreply66]

Louisianna inmates, after a 400-pound black bear moved into the courtyard of the state penitentiary. "It's like having another guard at no cost to the taxpayer," said Warden Burl Cain.

[noreply66]

Jaws, after an Australian swimmer fought of a great white shark that was chewing on his leg by ramming his finger in its eye.

[noreply66]

Shootouts, after a resturant owner and a security guard got into an argument in a Boulder, Colorado, parking lot and shot each other with Tasters, leaving then both agonized on the ground."It was kind of a bonehead deal," said a police sergeant.