Playing Time

[bbjunky81]

I'm pretty surprised this question is even being discussed but there have been a lot of really good answers.

I don't think the parents should contact the coach to discuss playing time. I absolutely think a kid can go to the coach and ask what they need to do / work on to get more playing time. If done correctly the coach will respect the young man for being honest and also showing he wants to help his team.

I just don't see any positives coming from a PARENT asking a coach about his sons playing time. As stated by a post earlier, there's not really a way the coach can word it to where many parents wouldn't feel disrespected. If you're a parent that wants to go to a coach and ask about your sons playing time, there's a high chance you won't take any criticism of your son's game lightly.

[Orestes']

This is always the Elephant in the Room. Everyone thinks their kid should get more. What's everyone's thoughts on this. Do parents have the right to question a coach about this and/or complain about it. Or does the Coach have ultimate authority and what he or she says goes and the parents and players just need to accept it?

I think if a player quits, then comes back to the team he should start, or at least play in front of who ever took his place in his absence. Cause that's how you build a winning program.

[Mike Hawk]

My recommendation, based on things I have seen this year, is to have the kid leave the team for awhile. Then he will learn to appreciate what he is missing. After a short sabbabtical the kid can return and will be a better contributor to the team.

[king kong]

Its easy to say, tell your kid to suck it up, but there are cases where personalities conflict. As parents we have no idea of exactly what is going on in practices, meetings, in the locker room, etc between our kids and coaches. Parents mostly see the product on game days, and what their child is telling them, or others are telling them.

My oldest child is not gifted in the height or speed side physically. He is still kind of young, 7th grade, but skill wise he has good abilities. However, being a head shorter and step slower, hard to find a spot for him in basketball. Baseball and football a little easier, but he loves basketball. I tell him time will change that, but its hard for him to see poor attitudes from teammates and opponents, yet they still play because coaches need them on the floor to win, versus him and a couple of others have good attitudes, but are still very immature physically struggle playing the game!

Try having that conversation with your kid, hey son, trust me one day you will hit your growth spurt and you will be the same size, but in the mean time watch everyone else get by with crap he cant behavior wise because coach wants only to win! At that age, coaches should emphasize attitudes over abilities, but we all know that wont happen! lol

[Orestes']

Its easy to say, tell your kid to suck it up, but there are cases where personalities conflict. As parents we have no idea of exactly what is going on in practices, meetings, in the locker room, etc between our kids and coaches. Parents mostly see the product on game days, and what their child is telling them, or others are telling them.

My oldest child is not gifted in the height or speed side physically. He is still kind of young, 7th grade, but skill wise he has good abilities. However, being a head shorter and step slower, hard to find a spot for him in basketball. Baseball and football a little easier, but he loves basketball. I tell him time will change that, but its hard for him to see poor attitudes from teammates and opponents, yet they still play because coaches need them on the floor to win, versus him and a couple of others have good attitudes, but are still very immature physically struggle playing the game!

Try having that conversation with your kid, hey son, trust me one day you will hit your growth spurt and you will be the same size, but in the mean time watch everyone else get by with crap he cant behavior wise because coach wants only to win! At that age, coaches should emphasize attitudes over abilities, but we all know that wont happen! lol

Just tell your kid to quit, and then later ask to rejoin the team. Then he'll probably start.

[itsme]

First thing parents need to learn that little Johnny is not a ALL AMERICA or maybe he just don't hustle in practice to have more playing time

[Tartanblue]

Parents have no clue what is happening at practice other than what their child could be telling them. The player could be an excellent athlete but slacks off in practice and could be getting out worked by another player who could play more for that reason. I feel it is ultimately the coaches decision parents should just stay out of it.

[Orestes']

First thing parents need to learn that little Johnny is not a ALL AMERICA or maybe he just don't hustle in practice to have more playing time

What? That just can't be. Johnny tells me he hustles and outworks every other player. And my boy Johnny don't lie neither, so I know he's right.

[itsme]

First thing parents need to learn that little Johnny is not a ALL AMERICA or maybe he just don't hustle in practice to have more playing time

What? That just can't be. Johnny tells me he hustles and outworks every other player. And my boy Johnny don't lie neither, so I know he's right.

That's the way I see it

[Big cat]

I would say that when a coach is approached by a player about playing time, the coach already knows that it's coming from the parent.
Most students just are not going to ask a coach about that on their own.
The coaches job is to put the best product on the court, at the Hs level. And hopefully not tear down a kids self esteem.

[SEFan]

Hustle is great and helps the team grow, but come game day (especially at the varsity level) your best players play. A parent getting a meeting to discuss playing time (even respectfully) is doing nothing but hurting the kid. “If you don’t like what is happening, mommy and daddy will take care of it for you.” Opposed to finding a solution (even a tough difficult hard one) and dealing with it.

[wobycat]

Basketball is tough. Kids practice and rarely see court. Eventually kids tire of the grind. In football you can put them somewhere usually on special teams but in basketball you can’t. I think if I coached basketball I’d try to think of ways to get kids some time even in tough games.

[Chief Kdogg]

Basketball is tough. Kids practice and rarely see court. Eventually kids tire of the grind. In football you can put them somewhere usually on special teams but in basketball you can’t. I think if I coached basketball I’d try to think of ways to get kids some time even in tough games.

I think every player should get equal amounts of playing time. If you come to practice you should get to play just as much as everyone else. Every team should get a trophy too. And every player should get a medal, and all trophies and medals should be exactly the same. We might want to look at turning off the scoreboard too, just so no one feels bad.

[Snowflake]

Basketball is tough. Kids practice and rarely see court. Eventually kids tire of the grind. In football you can put them somewhere usually on special teams but in basketball you can’t. I think if I coached basketball I’d try to think of ways to get kids some time even in tough games.

I think every player should get equal amounts of playing time. If you come to practice you should get to play just as much as everyone else. Every team should get a trophy too. And every player should get a medal, and all trophies and medals should be exactly the same. We might want to look at turning off the scoreboard too, just so no one feels bad.

Those are outstanding ideas. Especially the part about turning off the scoreboard. What purpose does that serve anyway? Other than make the losing team feel bullied, I see no reason for it. And some of these refs should be ashamed for the way they bully the players, coaches and fans. What's the world coming to when my short, weak, slow, awkward, timid, shy, nonathletic son Joey can't even make the varsity. He should get to play as much as the good players to IMO.

[PowerLifitingNut]

Basketball is tough. Kids practice and rarely see court. Eventually kids tire of the grind. In football you can put them somewhere usually on special teams but in basketball you can’t. I think if I coached basketball I’d try to think of ways to get kids some time even in tough games.

I think every player should get equal amounts of playing time. If you come to practice you should get to play just as much as everyone else. Every team should get a trophy too. And every player should get a medal, and all trophies and medals should be exactly the same. We might want to look at turning off the scoreboard too, just so no one feels bad.

Those are outstanding ideas. Especially the part about turning off the scoreboard. What purpose does that serve anyway? Other than make the losing team feel bullied, I see no reason for it. And some of these refs should be ashamed for the way they bully the players, coaches and fans. What's the world coming to when my short, weak, slow, awkward, timid, shy, nonathletic son Joey can't even make the varsity. He should get to play as much as the good players to IMO.

Yea great post. He!! just cancel all the games and play pick up ball. But no fouling and no one is allowed to shoot cause we don't want anyone to score and make Joey feel sad.

[Falcon01]

This is always the Elephant in the Room. Everyone thinks their kid should get more. What's everyone's thoughts on this. Do parents have the right to question a coach about this and/or complain about it. Or does the Coach have ultimate authority and what he or she says goes and the parents and players just need to accept it?

I can't believe this is even a question. Parents are literally the worst part of being a coach. There are always amazing, supportive, and great parents. But there are also the ones who don't wanna put the time in to coach but wanna tell you how to coach.

As a coach, this would be my answer to your question.
If you, or your child have an issue with playing time, the only person who should be coming to the coach, is the kid. I will respect a kid who comes to me, asks about playing time and wants to know how they can improve or get more time.


I'll give an example of why parents should not talk to coaches about playing time. I was coaching soccer, had a jv players dad come up to me after a game, and ask me why his daughter is not playing more. Told me that she's at practice every day giving you blood sweat and tears and she's not getting minutes. I explained to him that practice is absolutely where minutes are earned and that if he's willing to not tell his daughter he's coming, that he's welcome to come watch a practice somewhere she won't see him. I got an apology literally the next day from him.

Now that's not every situation, and most parents would tell their kid they're gonna be there to watch, but it's just an example that parents aren't at practice, they don't know how you game plan, and they don't know what is happening behind the scenes except what they see on the game field.

[Falcon01]

Sorry, gonna add on. One other problem is that kids know who should and shouldn't be playing. They know if they aren't working hard. But sometimes dad or mom at the dinner table are telling them otherwise. Or even saying coach should do this or that. Please don't do that as a parent. You're confusing them, and you can make them believe it. Don't be that parent.

[king kong]

Sorry, gonna add on. One other problem is that kids know who should and shouldn't be playing. They know if they aren't working hard. But sometimes dad or mom at the dinner table are telling them otherwise. Or even saying coach should do this or that. Please don't do that as a parent. You're confusing them, and you can make them believe it. Don't be that parent.

If some parents are asked to please be open about your kid not being as good as another, what about those parents that allow their kid to have a bad attitude and behavior in sports? Dont they have a responsibility to curb the behavior or is it win baby win and who cares?

[wobycat]

Basketball is tough. Kids practice and rarely see court. Eventually kids tire of the grind. In football you can put them somewhere usually on special teams but in basketball you can’t. I think if I coached basketball I’d try to think of ways to get kids some time even in tough games.

I think every player should get equal amounts of playing time. If you come to practice you should get to play just as much as everyone else. Every team should get a trophy too. And every player should get a medal, and all trophies and medals should be exactly the same. We might want to look at turning off the scoreboard too, just so no one feels bad.

Those are outstanding ideas. Especially the part about turning off the scoreboard. What purpose does that serve anyway? Other than make the losing team feel bullied, I see no reason for it. And some of these refs should be ashamed for the way they bully the players, coaches and fans. What's the world coming to when my short, weak, slow, awkward, timid, shy, nonathletic son Joey can't even make the varsity. He should get to play as much as the good players to IMO.

Taken way out of context but I am Not surprised by this forum. We are talking about kids that ARE good enough to make the team, practice just as hard, and for what to see the last minute of a 30 point blowout? No thanks.

[mikepike]

When my daughters started playing volleyball, I asked their coaches what they needed to work on. I then told my daughters what the coaches said, and left it up to them to choose to do what the coach said or not. Both did, and though they didn't play after junior high, it was nice to see their efforts rewarded in increased playing time. I did the same thing when my youngest started playing soccer this past year. She started from about the 5th game on because of her willingness to listen, her effort, and her willingness to work. And not because she's a stud soccer player! I'm sure there are coached who never want to be asked by a parent. I'm fortunate not to have had my kids coached by people like that.